I really questioned myself last night as I lay in bed listening to Lincoln screaming downstairs and hoping mommy manages to quieten him down soon…I really thought we might not be able to do this?

Reagan had gone down as easy as she usually does and we had sat downstairs with Lincoln sleeping and feeding all night and we were tired although it was only 10:30 so we decided to go to bed. So we locked up and moved Lincoln, but as soon as we did he woke. No problem we put him in his moses basket and carried him upstairs but even before we got there he was crying which then turns into screaming Jamie managed to calm him and we settled down to sleep but then he got hiccups and that woke him and he screamed and screamed no matter how we tried to help him, he just screamed. By midnight Jamie said she would go downstairs to feed him allowing me to sleep and take over later.

Listening to him scream knowing Jamie was as tired as me if not doubley so was difficult, I felt guilty for sleeping and listened for a while trying to get it right in my mind that she would be ok and I could return the compliment later allowing her to sleep. I drifted off but kept waking and dozing listening incase they needed me, this resulted in an ok nights sleep but not great!

As I said “a nights sleep because when I looked at the clock it was 6:45 which made me feel even more guilty because that meant Jamie had been awake all night so sheepishly I went downstairs worried about what I might find? What I did find was Jamie and Lincoln feeding and a story of 4 hours sleep although as with my night, not great.

So I went to get Reagan and made us all some breakfast and Jamie fed Lincoln then suggested she go to bed for a while which I agreed with and as Lincoln was now full and asleep she would take him with her but the same as last night a very tired Jamie fetched Lincoln back down so I took him off her and she went to bed again. Lincoln took a while to settle but he has been asleep now for over an hour and I have not heard from Jamie either I have played with Reagan and watched some CBeebies with her so she’s happy I just hope Jamie ca sleep a while longer and get some rest!

It makes me feel a bit better that I am returning the compliment and I can be part of the team, I might not be able to feed him but if he is fed I can certainly look after him while Jamie sleeps!

Because of the major surgery they call a C Section Jamie needs an anti-coagulant injection once a day for the next six weeks (nature makes a woman’s blood thicker for birth so she doesn’t bleed too much during and after birth and the new directive in England is this injection to avoid DVT’s) but she does not feel like she can inject herself even though she has more chance of doing it than Reagan or Lincoln!

So it is my responsibility to administer her injection everyday for the next six weeks and to begin straight away. The injection itself is “foolproof” it is pre-loaded use once throw away unit with a fine needle the correct length so you can not do it wrong…

The midwife told me when I picked them up from the hospital that you don’t see the needle you just remove the cap rest the end on the skin and plunge, so when I removed the cap and this 12mm long needle was visible I was straight on the phone asking if this was correct? Jamie usually has 100% trust in me but that percentage was a lot lower until the reasurance of the phone call told us that it was correct and the first advice either I had mis-heard or was incorrect.

Once that was that was sorted it our next conversation went something like this

“So you know what you’re doing?
“yes”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes!”
“and you’re ok with doing it?”
“YES!”
“…are you sure?”
“OFFS YES! Bend over you’re going to feel a small prick!”
“nothing new there then lol………..Ouch!”

It was pretty simple actually and we’ll be fine now but I have to say we were both nervous.

Jamie and I both feel the pressure of our near future, we discussed it on the way home from the hospital, the fact that our easy life has gone for a while not only will Lincoln take up a lot of our time but Reagan will need to adjust too. Both children need their own bit of love and care both for completely different reasons.

I feel so confident with Reagan and when she needs me my sleeves are immediately rolled up and I jump straight in but if Lincoln needs me my first reaction is to look to Jamie because mommy just knows what to do with\for both of them (I could add me into that list too) She says she doesn’t but she just seems to roll her sleeves up for both at the blink of an eye.

This is all mommy and me wanted we are soooo proud and excited to begin our lives together…

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